I have been wrestling with a question the last couple of weeks. How can you be vulnerable on your blog without being too vulnerable? The types of blogs that I identify most with aren’t ones that are a constant stream of “5 Steps to…” posts, but rather ones that delve into the lives and feelings of the bloggers. But I think it is also possible to get too personal. It seems like there is a constant battle between wanting to be real and transparent and oversharing.
What I Won’t Blog About
There have to be some boundaries, especially in regards to my marriage. There are some things that should just be between me and my husband. That means his thoughts and feelings are off limits. So is our sex life. So are struggles or arguments that we are currently in the midst of.
I think it is okay to blog about what we have learned after we have already worked through those arguments or funny things that happen between us because I want to be real to the fact that marriage is hard work sometimes and that things aren’t always sunshine and daisies.
Blogging doesn’t mean that you sacrifice having a private life. There are some things that you only want and need to share with the people that are closest to you and are trustworthy. Being vulnerable is not worth revealing things that will damage your relationships. And when you blog you are sharing your life with the whole world, potentially opening yourself up to criticism and hurt.
I also don’t think the world needs or frankly wants to know what I do every weekend. For me there is a balance between wanting my readers to get to know me (because I do want you guys to know the real me) and giving a play by play of what is happening in my life. So I’ll stick to mostly posts about what rattling around in my head at the moment and how that is playing out in my life, and not recaps.
What I Shouldn’t Blog About
I don’t want my blog to become a place for me to just air out all my gripes or dwell on the negative. And there is the temptation to do that. Major temptation. Either based on what is happening in my life or happening in the world around me. Let’s face it, life sucks sometimes, and when things aren’t going my way I sometimes want to let everyone know about it (or at least blab on and on about to my husband). I feel sorry for the guy sometimes.
While I don’t want to sidestep hard times or issues that I feel like I need to share about, I don’t want my blog to be a constant stream of negativity.
Should I Blog About It?
I received a comment on a post several weeks ago that made me feel pretty uncomfortable and wonder whether I really want to put myself and my marriage out there in such a public forum as a blog. Having a blog means that not only can anyone in the world potentially read it, but friends and family members that I know in real life too.
In the back of my mind there is always the thought that I could potentially offend someone by what I write. My views aren’t identical to everyone in my life, obviously. While it won’t keep me from writing what is on my mind, it is something that I think about. All people don’t handle their views being challenged in the best way and sometimes people can be plain mean.
There are also things that I am afraid to blog about. I was afraid to blog about the lump that I found a couple weeks ago (good news, it wasn’t anything serious). I don’t want to blog about those days when it feels like everything I do is a epic failure. I am afraid to reveal when anxiety gets the better of me and makes life difficult.
Perhaps that fear is an indication that I should be blogging about it once I am able to wrap my head around it. Both for me and for those readers out there that have had a health scare, felt like a failure, or struggle with anxiety on a daily basis.
How are you vulnerable on your blog without oversharing? Is there anything that you are afraid of blogging about?